Joe Renby: Marketing Director

October 31, 2011
by

1

BILL

It's been a while since Joe Renby has written any letters. He wants to try and break into the world of marketing, and has decided to try his luck with the biggest organisation in the UK: Her Majesty's Government.

“Iago make me lose my mind…”

September 25, 2011
by

4

I also have 'Return of Jafar' on VHS somewhere. I incessantly pestered my Mum to buy me it, and then only watched it once. I'm an awful person.

In a similar vein to yesterday's post, I'm having trouble understanding why DMX is so insistent upon rapping about Iago, the villainous parrot sidekick in Disney's Aladdin, in his track 'Party Up':

“Coat of Personality”

September 24, 2011
by

0

Using something from Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat seemed fitting. It will be the first and last time I think of that musical.

A few days ago, I was listening to Living Colour’s ‘Cult of Personality’. You might remember it from playing GTA San Andreas. Now I can’t stop thinking that they’re singing about coats. Listen and see what I mean: Maybe I just really need to buy a coat. It is getting colder. Liam

City worker, occasional blogger.

September 17, 2011
by

0

I’ve decided to post less frequently. Work and other commitments mean that I don't have much time to write, so I can't guarantee that what I publish is worth reading. Not that I was able to guarantee that even when I had so much free time that it practically leaked out of all of my orifices.

Posted in: General Waffle

You may say you enjoy dancing, but I’m on to you.

September 10, 2011
by

0

If you're wondering why I'm wearing an Iceland uniform, it was a theme event. The theme was 'What I Want to be When I Grow Up.' Oh, student irony! The pinnacle of humour...

Last night, I was at a work event. As the night progressed, something horrific began to occur: people started occupying the large, empty space at one end of the room. Their bodies contorted in spasmodic rhythms. They motioned for me to join them. Panic slowly set in. They were expecting me to dance.

Posted in: General Waffle

Lady models have it tough

September 4, 2011
by

1

That's not a feather boa. She actually has purple plumage. Unfortunate birth defect.

I feel very sorry for lady models. They work really hard at being born good looking, and then they have to be photographed doing ridiculous things. Here are a few examples I found while I was out on my biennial clothes hunt: “Yeah, I’m just sat on some wooden steps with my wabs out. What… [Read more…]

Posted in: Daguerreotypes

Block.

August 27, 2011
by

0

Still, this isn't a low point for my creative side. You should see some of the stories I wrote when I was fifteen.

As I write this, I’m sat on a train. The panic has set in, and I find I’m at a loss for a topic. I’ve not read anything in the news to write a witty piece about, and I’ve been really busy at work. I looked around, frantically trying to latch on to something, anything.… [Read more…]

Posted in: General Waffle

Joe Renby and the Mayor of London

August 21, 2011
by

0

boris476

I decided to email the Mayor of London with a genius idea for how to reduce congestion at the Underground ticket barriers during the Olympics.

Texty Feely

August 6, 2011
by

0

It's not really relevant, but it came up on a Google image search for 'touch typing' and I thought it was trippy as fuck.

“You might want to learn how to touch-type”, my new employers told me, “you’ll probably be taking notes at meetings.” Dutifully, I’ve started learning how to use all my fingers when typing, but now I worry that I’m groping my computer. My previous ‘technique’ consisted of banging down on the keys with my index fingers.… [Read more…]

Posted in: General Waffle

The best ways to avoid charity muggers

July 30, 2011
by

1

Taken from the Flickr of Satguru.

One of the things I miss about living in the countryside is being able to walk down the street without having some attractive young person with a clipboard appeal to my middle class guilt.

Posted in: General Waffle
Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.