Browsing All Posts published on »March, 2010«

Misheard Lyrics #2

March 31, 2010 by

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This misheard lyric comes courtesy of Chase & Status (feat. Plan B) with their Drum and Bass heartbreak anthem ‘Pieces’. To me it sounds like they’re singing ‘I remember when I used to feel something, I remember when I used to feel Sooty’. No longer being able to feel a hot piece of puppet like […]

Funeral Planning

March 30, 2010 by

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I spend a fair amount of time thinking about what I want my funeral to be like. Not in some gothy ‘woe is me’ kind of way, or anything. I just do. After watching Robocop, I decided that I want this to be the music that plays when the curtain closes around my coffin and […]

Clusterfail

March 29, 2010 by

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A clusterfail is a series of interconnnected fails. I believe that Craig David’s record company is guilty of one: Just sticking the letters ‘CD’ on a CD will cause some confusion, no doubt. I bet each person that was responsible for the creation of this CD thought it would be really cool to turn Craig […]

The Scientology Drinking Game

March 28, 2010 by

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A few years ago a group of representatives from the Church of Scientology attended a debate at my university. I picked up a promotional DVD (read: propaganda) from them at the end. I watched it, listened to their views, and then, like any thoughtful member of an enlightened and tolerant society, I made a drinking game out of it.

Yo’ Momma!

March 27, 2010 by

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Found this hilarious video. With the build up to the General Election, this is pretty much what the House of Commons has stooped to: Liam

Boring Japan Stories #2- The Kindness of Strangers

March 26, 2010 by

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When you’re in a foreign country it can be very hard finding your way. So sometimes you have admit that you’re pathetic and helpless, and rely on the help of complete strangers. Not only are they strangers, but they are also able to speak in a language you don’t know. For all you know, when someone you’ve asked for help begins talking to their friend in their native tongue they could be estimating how much they could get on the black market for one of your kidneys.

Things I’ve Done That I’m Not Proud of #2

March 25, 2010 by

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Whilst in my Halls of Residence at university, I informed everyone on my corridor about some maggots I’d found in one of the pans in the communal kitchen. There were no maggots. I just wanted the kitchen to get cleaned for once. And it did.

No One Wants to Hear Your Shitty 21st Century Stories, Pastbastard

March 24, 2010 by

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Suspended animation. The ability to freeze yourself, go to the future and impress all the futuristic people with the stories of the olden days. Yeah. Sex with futuristic hotties that will probably involve lasers somehow. Nice. This future may be closer than you think, folks. A recent video posted at TED.com has a scientist called […]

Things I’ve Done That I’m Not Proud of #1

March 23, 2010 by

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I once told a fat girl in a club that I was agoraphobic so that I had an excuse not to go on to the dance floor with her.

Dress Nicely Mondays: A Retrospective

March 22, 2010 by

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So today I had my first ‘Dress Nicely Monday’. The defining features of which are that it’s a Monday and I’m dressed nicely. I decided to do this because my current employment situation doesn’t give me much of an opportunity to wear the smart clothes that I have. In catwalk babble: My aim was to […]

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