Yes, I get that there’s a wave of temporary patriotism as England play in the world cup, and that this may prompt some folks to stick big flags on their houses. But what I don’t get is this game of one-upmanship that is taking place. I mean a big England flag is one thing, but people have started putting slogans on the flags as well. Here’s one example I found whilst on a walk:
‘Ah yes. What could I do to this instantly recognisable symbol of national pride to make it even more incredible? I know, I’ll stick a series of loosely connected words on it. That’ll do the trick.’
Never one to be outdone, I set out to make the most patriotic flag in the history of ever. I had it all mapped out in my head. It would be stylish and sleek. It would sum up English values and institutions. It would feature Frank Bruno. I set out to make a flag that every England fan could get behind. I think I succeeded.
Why aren’t you saluting?